|recording of my everyday feeling and my changes|
what is love? What's the difference between liking someone and loving someone ? Having liked(love is a word too heavy to me, I'm afraid of using this word.) a gay is still a sweet thing to me, although we have somekind of breaken up. That amazing feeling is such a beautiful thing, just like a beautiful pink rose, a hearing song or a gentle breeze. every wonderful thing existed in the world reminds me of love.
The above thing is only half of my feeling right now.
The other half is extremly different.
Sometimes I felt very ashamed to have been kissed by a person whom I don't love(only like maybe) and who don't love me. Whenver I thought of that kiss, I felt ashamed. I don't like that me and a little hate that me. This afternoon I ran to the playground to take some exercises as planned. It began to rain. I just kept running in the rain hoping the water can wash my shameness away.And my remining feeling about him, too. Just take them away. Leave me alone.
But love is still such a beautiful thing. Maybe I just have met the wrong person. No need to hate anything or anyone.
I should move on.
Recently, I found that I'm a very changnable and antinomy person.I need to find a way to handle this not so good character.
Judy @ 2005-06-12 00:25:46